I’m not myself right now. Can you forgive me?
I chose to end things with my best friend of 6 years.
Would it be worth the tears if your best friend betrayed your trust?
I gave her a chance.
The final chance to reflect upon her actions and show remorse on what was considered wrong within the outcome of this entire situation. Not only did she not see the heavy weight of betrayal that cut through my heart but she scarred it till the very end.
2 months of tears is enough. I don’t want to cry over someone whom is not worth it.
By the time she realises what she’s actually done, the damages would’ve already been indebted into my broke heart and I will never recover from those lies.
This feeling sucks.
It’s been a month. My friend has betrayed me to the point where I was in constant pain just crying over everything she’s done.
I’ve had enough. It’s not worth all these tears no more and it’s been a week since I’ve managed to stumble back onto my own two feet.
Oh how long this tiring week has been.
My feelings seem to be in the norm again and the feelings that was is now gone.
Here comes a new start and a new friendship.
I’m finally over it.
About that guy last time, he broke my heart last night.
I don’t care what people say. I don’t care if they say I’m not at fault. I don’t care if they say that he prefers to get hurt then have someone care for him like how I do.
He’s running away from his feelings and I’m a confrontational person. I’ll find my ways to get an answer out of him. If he doesn’t love me then he wouldn’t try to protect me from getting hurt in the future.
I know he’s hiding something.
I just miss him so much right now.
I met this guy today.
He was too funny & kind. It’s been a while….
I meant that! HAHA.
No, it was my birthday yesterday & I honestly couldn’t have asked for a better birthday celebration. I’m officially 19 now. I don’t know what to expect in life but I know I’m grateful for what I have so far.
My family. My friends (people whom I care for) & my education. Honestly, the list will go on. But I’m even grateful for my own father because he taught me the harsh truth of what a family can turn into. He is not someone whom I want in my life and I definitely do not want to see him ever again in this lifetime but without him, I would not be who I am. I matured at an early age and in the process of learning about life, I lost my chance to be young. Even though these things happened, I’m glad I have my mum, my twin sister and my little brother. They’re the reason why I’m still here. I’m not going to quit on what I want to aspire in life but I pray that without a doubt, happiness will come their way. They honestly deserve the best.
These past few weeks & next week
It’s just something that I’ve been doing or have been busy with and that’s why I haven’t been on tumblr guyysss :(
I’ve been busy with my assessments! I had like 6 to finish & I have 3 due this week.
It’s just a few more days before I can have my break! YAY
It’s just something I’ve been thinking about & stressing about.
I feel like my heart is walking on eggshells everyday.
Nothing seems to make sense anymore. Even though I’m on the path to become a psychologist, my thoughts keep drifting towards the problems I’ve neglected in the past and I feel as though they’re coming back to haunt me, hurt me and rip me apart.
So far into this course, not one day was I able to smile and be myself.
My past, my present and the future seems to be caught in this tension where I can’t help but to control the situation because if no-one took the initiative to lead this family, get it back on track and have an aim then where will we all head towards?
Now, after everything and discovering everything, I feel my sense of hope starting to drift further from the road I was aiming towards.
I’m losing hope for the future that I wanted.
I’m losing hope in myself & I just can’t deal with all this right now.
Has my addiction to cats/kittens these days been obvious?
I just want a pet that badly :(
I don’t know what nonsense I am spouting now since it’s 3:41am. ohmygawdd.
Yesterday
So did I tell you guys that I recently joined a book club? Apparently, it’s good to finish a novel each week so that’s my aim & that’s what started this ongoing book club with my friend!
I totally forgot that I have class tomorrow and here I was sitting watching my series of Fairy Tail Anime.
I NEED SLEEP D:
For the next 3 weeks, I will be so busy -cries-
It’s so horrible. This week I have 2 assessments due, next week I’ll have 3 due including 2 video projects and the week afterwards is my final week so I’ll have another 3 reports to get done.
So in these 3 weeks, I’ll need to cover at least 8 assignments. omfg.
I’m screwed. I will try not to stress and most of all, I’ll be chucking so many late nighters.
Just watch the eye bags grow :(
